The Past Lives of Shortwave

For as long as I can remember, I’ve always been that daydreamer who gets lost in stories…not in fanciful novels about fictitious characters – but in the biographies and works detailing the brilliant characters of history. I was first in line with my grade school class to go to the pioneer village and “touch the old things”. I was thoroughly unimpressed by replicas – I wanted the Real Deal.  Show me where the tuberculous patients actually died, original bedding a plus.

Yes, my love of history borders on morbid. And like many history buffs, I have found myself attached to certain historic eras throughout the ages. I’ve always been very attracted to the Middle Ages, for example. But everybody knows that the Medieval Period was a dreadful time of poverty, pestilence and ignorance for most people.  This leads me to conclude, whimsically, that I must have been lucky enough to have a great life during the Middle Ages. I remember it fondly, with gilded robes, and meals of mutton and wine by the warm fire. In that spirit, I thought I would include a list of my past lives in a time line fashion. Let us now trace the history of a soul who refused to be bound by the conventions of mediocrity.

3,026 B.C.E – Sumerian priestess, Temple of Inanna. Also a skilled cithara player. Died as a sacrifice for the goddess.

2,689 B.C.E – Eunuch wool dyer, and humble slave. Died of dehydration.

1,098 B.C.E – Druid forest dweller. Soothsayer. Died of toxic plant consumption.

600 B.C.E – Chinese potter, devout follower of Lao Tzu. Crushed to death by monolith.

326 B.C.E. – Skilled Persian horseman and avid Zorastrian. Thrown from horse.

52 B.C.E. – Noblewoman and Domina/Mistress of the house of Gaius Julius Caesar. Clogged artery.

250 C.E. – Still in Rome, love it here, who cares about the Fall. Mercenary soldier in the Gothic wars. Fatal wound.

779 C.E. – Viking housewife. Died giving birth to male triplets who went on to lead the army in conquering Germany and Belgium.

1100 C.E. – Bard and lute player to the court in medieval Hungary. Fell down the stairs dancing.

1501 C.E. – Enjoying the renaissance very much, thanks. Boy-loving philosopher-painter. Died of old age.

1779 C.E. – Victorian courtesan, discretely catering to the creative and unusual needs of high-powered clientele. Syphilis.

1899 C.E. – Typesetter and underground news reporter for various resistance movements. Died in jail awaiting trial.

1926 C.E. – Flapper and speakeasy girl of the American demi-monde. Died of partying.

That pretty much brings us up to speed. Not sure what I will do this life I have right now. But I can only hope it’s interesting enough to earn a juicy line in the history books.